A Light Has Shown

Down in “Foggy Bottom”, the old nickname for the US State Department headquarters in Washington, D.C. , some gray faced automaton in some section of some division of the Passport Office has come up with a brilliant idea.  (Incidentally, I think “Foggy Bottom” is perhaps the most bestest descriptive term for a government agency ever invented in the history of, to use an archaic term, Mankind.  It is surpassed only by the acronym sometimes employed for D.C. itself: S.O.G., meaning Seat of Government.)

You have leaned forward in your comfy chair.  Your attention is focused.  Your pulse has quickened.  What new device, policy, procedure, regulation has been put forward, initiated, promulgated to clarify, ease, improve and soften our condition here in this Vale of Tears?  How has the road been made straighter, the rough places smoothed, lately?

I haven’t the text of the actual ruling at hand, nor do I know how long the “vetting” process took from the conception, oops… of the idea to its birth …oops, again.  But the final document is very simple, in all the varied shadings of the word; as simple as most government regulations are…in all the varied shadings of the word.  It’s purpose and goal is to simplify the process of application for a passport.  In so doing, it has done away with having to name one’s father and mother.  An applicant simply has to put a name after “Parent 1″ and Parent 2”.  Or, it occurs to me now, all that may be needed is a check mark next to terms.  Read on and you will learn that one day, if all goes as it has been for the past few dozen years, even those terms which restrict and categorize , hmmm, how shall I refer to us?, well, Us All (to be Texan about it) will be as if they had never been.

Why not?  The logical extension of all the “Death of the Family” policies and practices, in vitro, abortion, same sex marriage, child sex selection, embryonic stem cell research, genetic manipulation, sperm donor registration and egg donations, surrogacy, “gay” rights, feminist studies and philosophy, etc., is viewing something like this as merely words on a form. And words and forms are changeable as clothes, lasting as snowflakes, permanent as the wind.

The explanation issued by someone, somewhere, is that the change was simply ( that word again ) to make the form gender neutral.  I suspect they will next do away with the “title” box.  You know the one which asks an applicant to decide is they are a Mr., Miss (oops), Mrs, or any or all of the above.  Gender used to be “sex” on such forms as these.  I was puzzled when it was replaced by “gender” until I discovered that folks were replacing their gender, or is it sex.  No, that cannot change, no matter what a surgeon’s knife, an endocrinologist’s hormones and a psychologist’s advice may tell one.  But, progress is being made.  Progress is being made.

We may anticipate the day with varying degrees of hopeful breathlessness when such entries on forms as parent, and the messiness of identifying a gender have been made unnecessary through the progress of science and bureaucratic charity.  It will be a more simple, more happy world without such disturbing things as “gender issues” and meddling parents to worry one.  Won’t it?

All it takes is one generation, a mere twenty five or so years, for the memory of what was natural to be obliterated from our collective minds. Do you doubt? Think then of a time when there was no such thing as a $13 billion dollar a year business in pornography; a time when it was not accepted by men and women as a healthy form of entertainment for the home. That’s merely one example.

We should look forward with joy to the day when our government’s Department of Sentient Production issues directives that henceforward a word such as “issue” or a term such as “conceptive product”, followed by a number, will replace child and children, and those produced in S.P. Centers will simply be issued numbers in a series prefixed by “M” or “F”, or “B” for both…a much more efficient use of materials.

Progress is so much to be desired. It cleans up the mess God should have paid attention to. As a matter of fact, that progress exists is the best proof of God’s non-existence; a mistaken belief which will soon join the belief in an earth centered universe and a flat world in the dust-bin of history; another thing (History, that is) which really doesn’t exist.

Paper, as anyone in government quickly learns, does not refuse ink.


About Peadar Ban

There isn't much to say. I am here. I am here. I am here.
This entry was posted in A Newer Better Way, Lies We Hide Behind, News and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to A Light Has Shown

  1. Gabriel Austin says:

    The next difficulty will be deciding which is Parent #1, Parent #2, as in Who’s On First.

    • Peadar Roe says:

      Parent One and parent Two sounds like the beginning of a Dr. Suess book:

      Parent one and Parent Two
      I want to know “Which are you?”
      Are you Parent One I ask
      The one with the bacon bringing home task?
      Or, are you Parent Two; the other who
      Cooks and cleans and makes the soup
      Tell me which you are I say
      So I can fill the form right away
      etc, ad nauseam…

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